1.
ENTERING A DISCUSSION
It can be difficult — even for native
speakers — to get into a discussion when others are speaking. Native speakers have
ways to get attention. No, they don’t stand up and wave their arms or whistle. They
use verbal signals. Here are a few.
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I’d like to say something about …
I want to say something about …
Let me say something about …
I’d like to make a comment about ...
I’d like to make a point about …
I have a point to
make about …
Here are some more signals in the
form of questions.
May I make a point here? I think …
May I say something here? I believe …
Can I say something? In my opinion …
Can I add something? It seems to me that …
Can I point out something? The fact is …
Can I make a comment? It is true that …
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Notice that when we
ask these questions, we do not wait for an answer. We are not asking for permission
to speak. We are only trying to get attention before we do speak. So we immediately go
ahead without waiting.
In the American language, there
is not an important difference between may I? and can I? — as there is
in British English. The expression can I? is not considered impolite or too
informal. More important for Americans is a polite tone of voice.
2. STATING A FACT
Everyone knows the difference
between a fact (Today is Monday.) and an opinion (Today is a great day.).
People create problems (bitter disagreement, attacks, etc.) in discussions when they
express their opinions as facts. Nevertheless, there are times when you must say that a
fact is a fact. Here are some signals to use.
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It is a fact that ...
The fact is that ...
I know for a fact that …
There is no disputing the fact that …
Surely, everyone knows that …
It has been proven that …
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3.
STATING AN OPINION
Sometimes it is very important and helpful to signal
to other people that you know that what you are saying is not a fact but your own personal
opinion. These signals do that.
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I think that ...
I believe that ...
*
I
feel that ... *
In my opinion, …
In my view, …
From my point of view, …
If you ask me, …
As I see it, …
It seems to me, …
As far as I’m concerned, …
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* When an American says "I
believe that …" or "I feel that ...", it does not mean that he or she has not given logical,
analytical thought to her opinion. It means "I think that …" or "In
my opinion, ..."
4.
STATING A STRONG OPINION
Sometimes we need to express
our opinion forcefully. We can do this in an acceptable way as long as we use a correct
signal. Here are some of them.
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I
definitely think that …
I firmly believe
that …
I certainly believe
that …
I really think that
…
I am convinced that
…
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5. STATING A
WEAK OPINION
Sometimes our opinion is not
so strong, perhaps because we don’t have all the information yet or we haven’t
had time to think the problem through. We want this to be clear to others in case we
decide to change our opinion later. Here are some phrases that signal a weak opinion.
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I tend to think that …
I’m inclined to think that …
I would think that …
I suppose that …
It seems to me that …
Don’t hold me to this, but …
I’m not sure, but …
I could be wrong, but …*
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* For an American, it is
not a sign of no confidence or weakness to say "I could be
wrong, but …" In fact, many respected experts will give a strong opinion with this signal! Why? Because we respect
people (and especially people in strong or high positions) who express humility.
6. ASKING FOR AN
OPINION
In American business
discussions, everyone is encouraged (or even expected) to give their opinions, including
about topics in which one is not an expert. It is generally believed that great ideas can
come from non-experts (for example, customers!). And it is not only for the discussion
leader to ask. Everyone may give and ask for opinions.
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I’d like to know your opinion about
this.
I’d like to hear your views on this.
What do you think?
What’s your opinion?
What’s your view on this?
What’s your position?
How do you see this?
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7. SHOWING AGREEMENT
In American business culture,
silence is not understood as agreement. If you agree with an opinion or an idea, you are
expected to say so. You don’t have to give a speech. These signals alone are enough.
In fact, agreement can also be shown without words — by your body language or your
facial expression.
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That’s a good idea.
That’s a good point.
Good idea.
Good point.
I agree.
I think so too.
That’s right.
I think you’re right.
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Strong agreement can be expressed
with these signals.
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I agree with you entirely.
I totally agree (with you).
I completely agree (with you).
I absolutely agree (with you).
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Weak or partial agreement can be
expressed with these signals.
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I tend to agree (with you).
I agree (with you) in principle, but …
I agree (with you) in part, but …
Well, you could be right.
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8.
SHOWING DISAGREEMENT
Expressing disagreement is
always respected as honest, and sometimes as courageous. Nevertheless, you can easily make
a mistake here. You must be careful.
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I’m sorry,
but*
I can’t agree.
I’m afraid*
I can’t agree.
I’m sorry, but*
I disagree.
I’m afraid*
I disagree.
With all due respect, …**
Your point is well-taken, but …
I have my own thoughts about that.
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* The phrases in red help to
soften the negative effect of disagreeing. Such "softeners" can be used in other
situations — for example, on the telephone — whenever negative information is
given (I’m sorry but his line is busy.).
** The signal "with all due respect" is
especially safe, even if you are disagreeing with your boss or his boss. For example,
television interviewers use this when disagreeing with (or correcting) very important
people, such as the president.
9.
SIGNALING A QUESTION
Americans often give a signal
that they are about to ask a question. Why? Probably because it is considered polite to
give the person a chance to prepare for a question. After all, some questions can be very
difficult.
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I’d
like to ask you a question. How much ...
I’ve got a question for you. Who is ...
I have a question. When will you ...
Here’s a question for you. What does ...
I need to know something. How many ...
Do you mind if I ask
a question? *
Why have you ...
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*
When we use the signal
"Do you mind if I ask a question", we are
not asking for permission to ask a question. It is only a signal that a question is
coming. Therefore, we don’t wait for an answer but immediately go on and ask the
question.
10.
CHECKING FOR UNDERSTANDING
These are signals that native
speakers use in order to be certain that they have understood another person correctly.
This is very often a wise thing to do, but especially if English is a foreign language for
you. Non-native speakers should have at least one of these signals ready to use when
taking part in English discussions.
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So in other words, you think …
Basically, what you are saying is …
If I understand you right, you think …
If I understood you correctly, you’re saying that …
Correct me if I’m wrong, but do you mean that …?
When you say … , do you mean that …?
Are you saying that …?
Would I be correct in saying that you think …?
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11.
SIMPLIFYING YOUR WORDS
Everyone at one time or
another will notice that he is talking and talking — just talking too much. So when
we want to stop and give a short summary — or to explain in a few words what all
those other words mean — we can use these signals.
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In other words, …
What I’m trying to say is …
What I’m getting at is …
What I mean is …
Let me put it another way.
Let me try to make that clearer.
Put simply …
The bottom line is …
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12. ASKING FOR CLARIFICATION
Sometimes we know for
certain that we have not understood another person. We have no understanding to check. So
we must ask the person to explain what he has said.
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(I’m sorry,) What do you mean?
I’m afraid
I don’t follow you. *
I’m sorry, but
I don’t see your point.
I’m afraid
I don’t understand.
Could you be more specific?
Could you be more precise?
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* The phrase "I don’t
follow you" means "I don’t understand". It does not mean "I don’t agree with you".
If the reason you don’t
understand is the fact that English is a foreign language for you, it is a good idea to
communicate that fact to the other people. Many (but not all) Americans do not know how
hard it can be to communicate in a foreign language. You can help yourself and them by
letting them know. Here is an example of how you can do this.
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I’m afraid my English isn’t
perfect, and I didn’t catch everything you said. Could you repeat it for me? (And
could you speak more slowly, please?)
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Finally, it is extremely
important to be able to ask for clarification of specific words or phrases. Pay very close
attention to the structure of these questions.
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What does "clarification" mean?
What does "to ask for clarification of
specific words or phrases" mean?
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Notice that the word
"mean" always comes after the words to be defined, no matter how long the phrase
is.
13.
NOT HEARING
Sometimes we don’t understand
because we didn’t hear clearly what was said.
| Could you repeat that? I didn’t hear
you.
Say that again, please? I didn’t hear you.
I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you.
I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that.
Sorry, what did you say?
Sorry, what was that?
What was that?
Pardon? *
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14.
INTERRUPTING
Interrupting someone is
another delicate area, like disagreeing with someone. We have to be careful about how we
do it. To make it more complicated, different cultures have different rules about
interrupting. For Americans, it is important to find the right moment to interrupt (for
example, when the speaker pauses or finishes a point). It is also good to indicate (by
your words and attitude) that you will not take a long time. An interruption should be
temporary and short.
| Excuse me, but …
Excuse me, but may I say something?
Excuse me, but may I ask something?
Excuse me, but may I remind you of something?
Excuse me for interrupting, but …
May I add one thing?
May I interrupt?
I’d like to add something here.
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You may observe in business that
Americans do not use these polite forms with each other. In fact, Americans can be very
rough in the way they communicate. It is important to realize two things. First, roughness
and bluntness is often a sign of informality and familiarity among Americans. Second,
foreigners who try to imitate this style too soon may not be accepted in the same way, so
be very careful. If you do manage to be accepted as a real part of an American team, you
may forget about these polite signals. But until then, it is a good idea to use them
whether the other people do or not.
15.
BLOCKING
Of course, someone else
may want to interrupt while you are talking. If you don’t mind, then there is no
problem. But if you want to block the other person — at least for a moment while you
finish your point — then you can use these signals.
| Just a moment, please.
Let me finish, please.
Let me make my point first.
I’d like to say this first.
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However, don't expect that you
can prevent that person from talking for very long. At the first opportunity, it is
a good idea to come back to her and signal that it is okay now for her to speak.
| Ms. Smith, you wanted to say something?
Mary, what did you want to say?
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16. SIGNALING A PROPOSAL
A proposal is an idea for
action. Another word for "proposal" is "suggestion". Either word is
okay, although "proposal" is more formal and is not used much in informal
conversations.
| I have a proposal to make.
I have a suggestion to make.
I would like to make a proposal.
I would like to make a suggestion.
Here’s an idea.
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17. MAKING A PROPOSAL
Signaling a proposal is a lot
like signaling a question. First we warn the people that a proposal is coming. Then we
make the proposal.
| I propose that we …
I suggest that we …
I say we should …
Maybe we should …
Why don’t we …
Let’s …
How about …*
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* Remember, after a
preposition --- for example, "about" --- we use the "ing" form of a
verb.
How about starting in April?
How about building
a new factory?
18. SUPPORTING A PROPOSAL
Some of these signals are the
same as signals for showing agreement (# 7).
| That’s a very good suggestion.
I’ll go along with that.
I’ll second that. *
That’s a good idea.
I like that idea.
That sounds good.
Good idea.
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* The phrase "I’ll
second that" is used in formal meetings where it is necessary for another person to show support for a
proposal before it can be voted on. The phrase can only be used once and only by the first
person to show support. Sometimes Americans like to use it in informal meetings where it
is not necessary. Nevertheless, it still can only be used by the first person to show
support. (To introduce humor, sometimes the next supporter will say "I’ll third
that" but this is never used in a formal meeting.)
19.
OPPOSING A PROPOSAL
Similar to showing
disagreement (# 8
), opposing a proposal should be
done with caution, depending on whose proposal it is. If you have to be very diplomatic,
use the "softeners" in green.
| I’m sorry, but
I am opposed to the proposal.
I’m sorry, but I can’t support the proposal.
I’m sorry, but I don’t think that’s such a good
idea.
I’m afraid I think that would be a mistake.
I’m afraid that doesn’t sound very good to me.
With all due respect,
that sounds like a bad idea
to me.
Quite honestly, I think that would be a big mistake.
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